MaryanneLive.com Blog
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It seems to me when I was a kid, I learned by watching people, my parents in particular, that feeling out loud was a bad idea~ the trouble was, I had LOTS of feelings. Some of which, I learned, would never be appropriate to express. So what is a kid to do? For me, I found alcohol. WOW, what a great freedom from all that intensity fighting to make its way to the surface. A few sips and an immediate hush would come over me, turning off all the chattering voices and uncomfortable feelings~or so I thought. There they all were after I came around~ I didn’t care that it was temporary, any relief at that time seemed most excellent. The fact that I was 12, however, made things more complicated. Long story short, I would eventually learn that putting off feeling (medicating instead) wasn’t the path I wanted to take given that this illusory, temporary numbing had severe side effects, some of which were permanent, like death. I lost several friends who were under the influence of this, that, and the other thing, including alcohol. And at 16 that put me on a path that I remain on today, which as Doctor Sheen (my latest live radio interview, author of Educate, Don't Medicate!) puts it is to address my feelings first, to educate myself about my intricate self, my body/mind/spirit system so I would choose to love rather than harm myself more often than not~and eventually the goal is to never choose to harm myself. (I wish I were perfect.) None the less what remains is that we here in the good old US value a placid and bridled approach to being, as it is more pleasant (it seems) to be around than an authentic ebb and flow of true feeling~ In other words, being out of touch with our feelings, walking around a poser is rewarded~being effusive not so much.
This is precisely why one of the tools in my relationship tool belt is called responsible communication. Because I believe that we cannot heal or deal unless we feel everything that wants expression up and out, all the way out loud. The alternative is what we see most, an ego-based and fake existence shrouding our relationships and life experiences to the point at which we feel so disconnected from ourselves and others we see no other choice but to give in and medicate, with TV, drugs, food, on and on. The choice is always ours, that’s the good news~feel, deal and heal or check out. If you want the good stuff, the great relationships, the rich existence, the true divine connection, all you have to do is Begin Within®! |
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Keep those feelings comin'